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UFOs
Have
you noticed since everyone has a camcorder these days no one
talks about seeing UFOs like they used to?
I saw
Elvis. He sat between me and Bigfoot on the UFO.
UMEMPLOYMENT
It's a
recession when your neighbour loses his job; it's a depression
when you lose your own.
-
Harry S. Truman.
A man
willing to work, and unable to find work, is perhaps the saddest
sight that fortune's inequality exhibits under this sun.
-
Thomas Carlyle.
Unemployment diminishes people. Leisure enlarges them.
-
Mason Cooley.
UNITED NATIONS &
NATO
Does
the UN need an overhaul? Somebody has a sense of humour. It
needs scrapping. It serves no useful purpose and has failed at
nearly every opportunity when it could have done something. As
it stands it is a very expensive ‘talking shop’ and a stage for
tin-pot dictators and genocidal regimes to ‘strut their stuff’.
- John
Penling.
It's
like carrying frogs in a wheelbarrow.
- General Secretary of
NATO, Lord Robertson, on the difficulties of getting consensus
among all the member states.
As we
watch the sun go down, evening after evening, through the smog
across the poisoned waters of our native earth, we must ask
ourselves seriously whether we really wish some future universal
historian on another planet to say about us: "With all their
genius and with all their skill, they ran out of foresight and
air and food and water and ideas," or, "They went on playing
politics until their world collapsed around them."
- U
Thant, Secretary General of the United Nations, speech, 1970
Humour
has a way of bringing people together. It unites people. In
fact, I'm rather serious when I suggest that someone should
plant a few whoopee cushions in the United Nations.
- Ron
Dentinger.
UNIVERSE
In the beginning, the
Universe was created.
This has made a lot of
people very angry, and has been widely regarded as a bad move.
- Douglas Adams, The
Hitch Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy.
My own suspicion is that
the universe is not only queerer than we suppose, but queerer
than we can suppose.
- J.B.S. Haldane,
Possible Worlds and Other Papers.
The
universe is full of magical things patiently waiting for our
wits to grow sharper.
- Eden
Phillpotts, A Shadow Passes.
I'm
worried that the universe will soon need replacing. It's not
holding a charge.
-
Edward Chilton.
I feel
like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.
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